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Thread: If You’ve Said This Recently to Your Daughter, You May Be Perpetuating a Cycle of Vio

  1. #51
    Veteran Member Chief's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bajisima View Post
    So you dont think you would consider a 20 year old when you are 72 like Mick Jagger currently is??
    I think Djinn needs more life experience before he'd be ready for a 20 year old.
    Thanks from bajisima and Djinn

  2. #52
    Veteran Member DebateDrone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madeline View Post
    Fucking AlterNet. Literally the LAST place anyone should be getting parenting advice.

    Sexual harrassment, a la Weinstein, is not sexual assault. There is a weird liberal move going on to muddy the waters to such a degree, the public begins to think sexual harassment must be proven beyond a reasonable doubt. Etc.

    OBVIOUSLY, females need to be taught to be assertive, etc. As do males.
    Seems to me that Paz de la Huerta is claiming HW raped her... Not sexual harassment. Charges are being prepared.

    There is no muddling of the facts. HW sexually harassed some women and is accused of rape with others.

    Some men can act normally with some women and talk randy and blue in front of others while sexual harassing others and even raping others.

    Harvey's behavior was not the same in all circumstances... with all women.
    Thanks from Friday13

  3. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by StanStill View Post
    Gotcha. You're funny then. Not hilarious.
    Mr. Stan,

    I am rather witty, true. A droll fellow, as it were.

    Thank you for noticing.

  4. #54
    The Un-Holy One The Man's Avatar
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    Both genders can be "persistent" that way lol

    I myself once had a crazy ex-gf back in Moscow, who would follow me around everywhere, to and from every fucking class at school, and also from and to home before and after. She would bloody glare at every other girl who tried to talk to me, I kid you not haha

    Once, she showed up at my place in the middle of the night. I was living in a communal apartment with a bunch of other people. She woke up everyone, it was like 3 in the morning, ringing the bell over and over and banging on the front door. Turned out, she DREAMT me in bed with someone else and (believing it was some sort of psychic vision) she sneaked out from her parents and rushed over to my area, across the fucking neighborhood in the middle of the night

    Later, there was this guy, one of my friends, who was kind of an asshole, owed me and a bunch of us money, from card games and such, which he never paid up for; among other things. And, as punishment (and to finally get rid of this insane girl), I set her up with him instead. Then, she could make his life hell instead lol
    Thanks from bajisima and Kallie Knoetze

  5. #55
    Veteran Member MaryAnne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by HayJenn View Post
    Mmmm, Weinstein was sexual assault.
    Quote Originally Posted by Chief View Post
    I think Djinn needs more life experience before he'd be ready for a 20 year old.
    Like when he is 72?

  6. #56
    No mercy for losers Addiction Solitaire Champion, Double Deuce Champion, Queen Jewels Champion, Ray Ray Shuffle Champion, Twins Champion, Blow Up: Arcade Champion, Bunch - Time Trial Champion, Znax Champion, Zoo Keeper Champion, Sobics School Champion, Swap a Smiley Champion, Makos Champion, Dino Drop Champion, Flower Frenzy Champion, Some Puzzle Champion, Funny Bubbles Champion, CubeZ Champion, Dinky Smash Champion, Fun Fun Animals Champion, Fruit Fabriek Champion, Raft Wars Champion, Rainbow Monkey RunDown Champion, Raft Wars Champion, Crime Puzzle Champion Blueneck's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chief View Post
    That's what I am thinking... they need to learn how to be assertive, without being overbearing. How to lead, without being condescending. How to be open minded, but also strong in conviction. There are a lot of yin and yang to it... and I think most learn by trial and error. So long as the "error" isn't to egregious, we need to help them learn. I think also, we need girls to be supporting girls too. Let them blossom as they follow their path, rather than push them into our expectation. Still, a nudge or two doesn't hurt if we think they are heading in a bad direction.
    I think we've become a society where we think part of the reward for success is to be in a position to treat underlings with disrespect. Trump's bragging about how being a star you can get away with anything gives everyone the wrong idea how power is acceptably wielded and those without it will accept abuse of all kinds so it's okay to mistreat people because "they let you".

    I worry that separating sexual misconduct by those with power without addressing other forms of abuse is missing an opportunity to redefine what leadership is all about. I've worked for good bosses and bad bosses and I thrived in environments where I wasn't afraid of the blowback if I owned my mistakes. To me it's a small step from a boss who ridicules, yells, uses demeaning language or humiliation to try to get better performance from employees to one who feels entitled to subject them to sexual abuse. It's not illegal to treat people like crap, but that shouldn't be condoned by anyone. I specifically think it should be a mark against anyone being considered for a management job in business, if for no other reason than I believe whatever results are perceived to be garnered by this kind of management style are offset by higher rates of employees who are miserable and end up calling in sick more often, or quitting. And people driven to achieve success just so they can treat others like crap has got a screw loose anyway.

    This whole thing about blaming others "who knew" and didn't say anything can be mitigated if higher ups who don't let the guy with the enormous ego and a chip on his shoulder be in management, no matter how brilliant he may be.

    I'm thinking to some degree about actors (Kevin Spacey) and comedians (Louis CK) who had bosses of their own who probably saw the problem and were in a position to not hire them in the first place, but chose to anyway because they put dollar signs ahead of everything else.

    Blaming people who are lateral or below an abusive person in a power structure for not speaking out is just one more way the people who should be held responsible for handling the problem aren't.

    Which many would see as just one more perk of being at the top. I know in the case of someone like Trump as the apex of a private company there's no one to stop him, but when Weinstein's behavior become public the board of his corporation fired his ass, but they paid off accusers before and did know and waited till they had to do something before they acted.

    So it breeds an atmosphere of "there's nothing you can do" if the people who do have the power to intervene look the other way and discourages whistle blowing at the bottom.
    Thanks from boontito, TennesseeRain and bajisima

  7. #57
    On the Diversary Committe TennesseeRain's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Djinn View Post
    They're all messed up. Teenage girls are incomprehensible. Teenage boys are just stupid. This is coming from someone who has a 17 year-old daughter, and a 13 year-old son.
    I have two teenage daughters and I'm finding this time with them has been the most rewarding time of all. I never wanted to wish their childhood away, but this time with them now is so amazing. I don't want it to end.
    Thanks from Blueneck, boontito and Friday13

  8. #58
    On the Diversary Committe TennesseeRain's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madeline View Post
    Ironically, this post illustrates the strength of character and restraint I find so appealing in some men.

    Fact is, people, the words we say to our tweenies and teens are not likely to have much effect on how they relate to the opposite sex. But what we do is definitely highly persuasive.

    If you are modeling self-respect, mutual respect and assertiveness for your child, they are very likely to imitate you. And the reverse is also true.

    Parents who divorce during these years in their kids' lives need to be particularly careful.
    Bullshit. Words matter. Conversation. Trust. Relationship building. Those all rely on words and they do matter when it comes to teens. Here you are again lecturing people on a subject you clearly know little about. Anyone who takes your advice would be a fool.
    Thanks from boontito

  9. #59
    New Member WisconsinCheeseNip's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Madeline View Post
    Fucking AlterNet. Literally the LAST place anyone should be getting parenting advice.

    Sexual harrassment, a la Weinstein, is not sexual assault. There is a weird liberal move going on to muddy the waters to such a degree, the public begins to think sexual harassment must be proven beyond a reasonable doubt. Etc.

    OBVIOUSLY, females need to be taught to be assertive, etc. As do males.





    Yes -


    BIG DIFFERENCE between them. Harrassent and RAPE.

    .................................................. ...........................

    FIRST LET US NOT WATER DOWN the language because the alledged perpetrator is a celebrity, policeman, or politician

    - they say 'sexual misconduct' or 'assault' instead of rape.


    ... THAT IS WHAT THE TV NEWS ALWAYS DOES in order to protect the Establishment or the Elites, celebs and film or recording star big money makers.

    CALL THE INCIDENT WHAT IT IS - RAPE.

    .................................................. ......

    SECOND, as a male victim of rape at least twice, (and not in prison) I have a problem with certain media stars like 'Charmed' actress Rose McGowen taking $100,000 dollars to settle and hush up, then play Joan of Arc 20 years later - like she's a brave hero.


    As for her colleague Allysa Milano - going around saying to victims : go to #metoo. Like that is the solution. Going on Twitter is CATHARTIC FOR RAPE - I THINK NOT !


    CALLING THE POLICE THAT DAY - they were there in 20 minutes, and arrested my Filipino neighbor within the hour. THAT IS CATHARTIC. The jerk - touched my wang after inviting me
    in for Fruit Loops cereal - his sons were my childhood playmates.

    But I was RAPED by a woman also in 2005, AGAIN by a fifty year old doctor during a pre-
    employment physical exam in 2002, and HARRASSED three more times in my life by school
    or business officials.

    .................................................. ......................

    THIRD, AlterNet is a crappy Democrat driven piece of garbage that puts trojans on your browser and tries to brainwash you into Party and website donations while it corrupts your operating system. BULLYING IS NOT RAPE ARSE-FACES - Asia Argento says, Weinstien raped her
    before they became consensual sex partners - figure that one out - so Liberal webzines and TV are FOREVER BLURRING THE LINES INTO GREY AREAS whether the subject is war, rape, corruption, kickbacks, impeachable offenses, to protect themselves or say Albert Gore ?

    ....................

    Two More Massage Therapists Accuse Al Gore of Sexual Assault
    Two More Massage Therapists Accuse Al Gore of Sexual Assault - Business Insider


    NY Times Barely Reported 2010 Al Gore Sex Assault Police Investigations
    NY Times Barely Reported 2010 Al Gore Sex Assault Investigations | Observer

  10. #60
    New Member Redwood Burl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Djinn View Post
    To be fair - they come up with good lines. We were just college-shopping in Baltimore. We were walking along the harborfront, from the science center back to our car, when we passed a "Hooters" restaurant. At age 13, my son was straining his eyeballs to look through the windows without it being obvious. Then he suddenly exclaims "Oh - I just got it! The 'Os' in 'Hooters' are supposed to look like boobs!"
    I always wondered about that....

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