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Thread: Jesus behind the KFC...

  1. #21
    the "good" prag pragmatic's Avatar
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    Appears the baby alligator may have playfully nipped Tito on the neck....

  2. #22
    RNG
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    Quote Originally Posted by pragmatic View Post
    Well it's obvious at a glance that those two are fast-tracked to heaven.
    Thanks from StanStill

  3. #23
    Anarquistador StanStill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pragmatic View Post
    Easy to see how people got fooled. Wouldn’t you buy a gold plated ticket from that guy?

  4. #24
    the "good" prag pragmatic's Avatar
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    Tito has dreams of coming back to Earth as a big ol' tiger.....
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  5. #25
    RNG
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    Quote Originally Posted by StanStill View Post
    Can you explain what criteria you use to determine that Snopes is a leftist propaganda machine? I’ve never called it that, but I’d love to see explain it.
    The search would be too boring, and that is the greatest weakness of PH. The search function is awkward, being charitable. But many RWs have claimed that when one of their sacred creeds was denied by Snopes.

  6. #26
    Anarquistador StanStill's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RNG View Post
    The search would be too boring, and that is the greatest weakness of PH. The search function is awkward, being charitable. But many RWs have claimed that when one of their sacred creeds was denied by Snopes.
    I’ll save you the trouble... many have claimed, but none have ever explained.
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  7. #27
    Veteran Member Micro Machines Champion, Race Against Time Champion Tedminator's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pragmatic View Post
    eew, I would never buy golden tickets from those two.

  8. #28
    Shitposting Rank 4 Missle Command Champion johnflesh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RNG View Post
    The Trump University and Trump Casino Trump?

    What left turn? You really hate the truth.
    What?

  9. #29
    Shitposting Rank 4 Missle Command Champion johnflesh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pragmatic View Post
    "Police said they confiscated over $10,000 in cash, five crack pipes and a baby alligator."
    Sounds legit guys.

  10. #30
    Veteran Member Madeline's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by knight View Post
    JACKSONVILLE, Florida –

    Tito and Amanda Watts were arrested over the weekend for selling “golden tickets to heaven” to hundreds of people. The couple, who sold the tickets on the street for $99.99 per ticket, told buyers the tickets were made from solid gold and each ticket reserved the buyer a spot in heaven — simply present the ticket at the pearly gates and you’re in.

    selling-golden-tickets
    “People can sell tickets to heaven,” a Jacksonville police spokesman said. “But the Watts misrepresented their product. The tickets were just wood spray painted gold with ‘Ticket To Heaven – Admit One’ written in marker. You can’t sell something as gold when it’s not. That’s where the Watts crossed the line into doing something illegal.”

    Tito Watts said in his police statement:

    I don’t care what the police say. The tickets are solid gold… it ain’t cut up two by fours I spray painted gold. And it was Jesus who give them to me behind the KFC and said to sell them so I could get me some money to go to outer space. I met an alien named Stevie who said if I got the cash together he’d take me and my wife on his flying saucer to his planet that’s made entirely of crack cocaine. You can smoke all the crack cocaine there you want… totally free. So, try to send an innocent man to jail and see what happens. You should arrest Jesus because he’s the one that gave me the golden tickets and said to sell them. I’m willing to wear a wire and set Jesus up…more insanity in the link.

    Couple Arrested For Selling "Golden Tickets To Heaven"

    This is very seriously stupid. I'm debating on the cause...drugs or religion? The two go hand in hand in many ways. Both make you dumber, both are dangerous.
    To me, the jury is still out on the cause of this.
    This is a bit too consistent for a psychotic break. It's linear in time and characters have an actual plot to follow.

    I suspect Shitty Con Man is pretending to be Batshit in order to evade the consequences of his actions.

    Silly man. He can probably plead out to little more than disturbing the peace.

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