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Thread: Jesus behind the KFC...

  1. #1
    MeBelle Fan Boi knight's Avatar
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    Jesus behind the KFC...

    JACKSONVILLE, Florida –

    Tito and Amanda Watts were arrested over the weekend for selling “golden tickets to heaven” to hundreds of people. The couple, who sold the tickets on the street for $99.99 per ticket, told buyers the tickets were made from solid gold and each ticket reserved the buyer a spot in heaven — simply present the ticket at the pearly gates and you’re in.

    selling-golden-tickets
    “People can sell tickets to heaven,” a Jacksonville police spokesman said. “But the Watts misrepresented their product. The tickets were just wood spray painted gold with ‘Ticket To Heaven – Admit One’ written in marker. You can’t sell something as gold when it’s not. That’s where the Watts crossed the line into doing something illegal.”

    Tito Watts said in his police statement:

    I don’t care what the police say. The tickets are solid gold… it ain’t cut up two by fours I spray painted gold. And it was Jesus who give them to me behind the KFC and said to sell them so I could get me some money to go to outer space. I met an alien named Stevie who said if I got the cash together he’d take me and my wife on his flying saucer to his planet that’s made entirely of crack cocaine. You can smoke all the crack cocaine there you want… totally free. So, try to send an innocent man to jail and see what happens. You should arrest Jesus because he’s the one that gave me the golden tickets and said to sell them. I’m willing to wear a wire and set Jesus up…more insanity in the link.

    Couple Arrested For Selling "Golden Tickets To Heaven"

    This is very seriously stupid. I'm debating on the cause...drugs or religion? The two go hand in hand in many ways. Both make you dumber, both are dangerous.
    To me, the jury is still out on the cause of this.

  2. #2
    Shitposting Rank 4 Missle Command Champion johnflesh's Avatar
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    They are conmen.

  3. #3
    Veteran Member Moorhuhn Wanted Champion Hollywood's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by johnflesh View Post
    They are conmen.
    I expect them to be made part of the trump Administration any day. THAT fucking crazy and they managed to sell "HUNDREDS of them?
    Trump would appreciate talent like that.
    Thanks from Friday13

  4. #4
    Shitposting Rank 4 Missle Command Champion johnflesh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hollywood View Post
    I expect them to be made part of the trump Administration any day. THAT fucking crazy and they managed to sell "HUNDREDS of them?
    Trump would appreciate talent like that.
    Alright. This thread took the usual left turn.

  5. #5
    Anarquistador StanStill's Avatar
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    Hate to piss in the punch bowl, but...

    Was a Couple Arrested for Selling Golden Tickets to Heaven?

    CLAIM
    Two people in Florida were arrested for selling golden tickets to heaven.

    RATING

    FALSE

    ORIGIN
    On 31 March 2015, the web site Stuppid published an article reporting that two people were arrested in Jacksonville, Florida, for selling golden tickets that guaranteed the holders entrance to heaven upon their demise:

    Many readers shared the above-referenced story via social media, apparently believing that two people named Tito and Amanda Watts were actually arrested for perpetrating this form of scam. The report, however, was just another fabricated clickbait tale from a fake news site.

    Stuppid.com‘s disclaimer advises readers that the site publishes the “stupidest, craziest stuff we can find,” and the stuff they “find” is typically made up by them. Popular past hoaxes from Stuppid include reports of a Nazi couple accidentally receiving sperm from a black donor, a 14-year-old girl’s giving birth to Jesus, and a toddler’s being thrown from a roller coaster.

    The photograph of “Tito Watts” that accompanied the original article was an unrelated 2011 image taken from a collection of bizarre police mugshots

    Later versions of this hoax changed the protagonists from a Florida couple to a “Zimbabwe pastor.”

  6. #6
    Shitposting Rank 4 Missle Command Champion johnflesh's Avatar
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    Well well, it wasn't conmen, religious people or drugs - it was gullibility. hahahaha
    Thanks from boontito

  7. #7
    MeBelle Fan Boi knight's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by StanStill View Post
    Hate to piss in the punch bowl, but...

    Was a Couple Arrested for Selling Golden Tickets to Heaven?

    CLAIM
    Two people in Florida were arrested for selling golden tickets to heaven.

    RATING

    FALSE

    ORIGIN
    On 31 March 2015, the web site Stuppid published an article reporting that two people were arrested in Jacksonville, Florida, for selling golden tickets that guaranteed the holders entrance to heaven upon their demise:

    Many readers shared the above-referenced story via social media, apparently believing that two people named Tito and Amanda Watts were actually arrested for perpetrating this form of scam. The report, however, was just another fabricated clickbait tale from a fake news site.

    Stuppid.com‘s disclaimer advises readers that the site publishes the “stupidest, craziest stuff we can find,” and the stuff they “find” is typically made up by them. Popular past hoaxes from Stuppid include reports of a Nazi couple accidentally receiving sperm from a black donor, a 14-year-old girl’s giving birth to Jesus, and a toddler’s being thrown from a roller coaster.

    The photograph of “Tito Watts” that accompanied the original article was an unrelated 2011 image taken from a collection of bizarre police mugshots

    Later versions of this hoax changed the protagonists from a Florida couple to a “Zimbabwe pastor.”
    I saw that, but I don't know...I say there may be some truth in the store still.
    It could happen...and Tito has grill marks on his face...those two did something stupid.
    Thanks from Friday13

  8. #8
    Shitposting Rank 4 Missle Command Champion johnflesh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by knight View Post
    I saw that, but I don't know...I say there may be some truth in the store still.
    It could happen...and Tito has grill marks on his face...those two did something stupid.
    lol
    Thanks from Tedminator

  9. #9
    Bad Policy Good Politics DebateDrone's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by johnflesh View Post
    Well well, it wasn't conmen, religious people or drugs - it was gullibility. hahahaha
    so selling prayer cloths or river of Jordan water or rock of wailing wall are legal because?
    Thanks from Friday13

  10. #10
    Shitposting Rank 4 Missle Command Champion johnflesh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by DebateDrone View Post
    so selling prayer cloths or river of Jordan water or rock of wailing wall are legal because?
    You tell me. It's your argument now.

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