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Thread: Marriage License Clerk Walks Off The Job After Too Many Bizarre Requests

  1. #1
    Galactic Ruler Spookycolt's Avatar
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    Marriage License Clerk Walks Off The Job After Too Many Bizarre Requests

    We warned you this would happen but the left did not listen.

    Well here ya go.



    Marriage Licenses
    A county clerk in San Francisco started his new job on the day that DOMA was repealed. He just happened to be assigned to marriage license detail as well to assist in the extra flow of traffic that was sure to follow. He was not ready for what came next…


    First Marriage License:


    Clerk – “Next.”

    Couple – “Good morning. We want to apply for a marriage license.”

    Clerk – “Names?”

    Couple – “Tim and Jim Jones.”

    Clerk – “Jones? Are you related? I see a resemblance.”

    Couple – “Yes, we’re brothers.”

    Clerk -“Brothers? You can’t get married.”

    Couple*– “Why not? Aren’t you giving marriage licenses to same gender couples?”

    Clerk -“Yes, thousands. But we haven’t had any siblings. That’s incest!”

    Couple*-“Incest?” No, no, we are not gay.”Clerk -“Not gay? Then why do you want to get married?”

    Couple*– “For the financial benefits, of course. And we do love each other. Besides, we don’t have any other prospects.”

    Clerk -“But we’re issuing marriage licenses to gay and lesbian couples who’ve been denied equal protection under the law. If you are not gay, you can get married to a woman.”

    Partner 1*-“Wait a minute. A gay man has the same right to marry a woman as I have. But just because I’m straight doesn’t mean I want to marry a woman. I want to marry Jim.”

    Partner 2 -“And I want to marry Tim, are you going to discriminate against us just because we are not gay?”


    Clerk -“All right, all right. I’ll give you your license.”

    Next Marriage License:

    Couple*-“Hi. We are here to get married.”

    Clerk -“Names?”

    Couple*-“John Smith, Jane James, Robert Green, and June Johnson.”

    Clerk -“Who wants to marry whom?”

    Couple*-“We all want to marry each other.”

    Clerk -“But there are four of you!”

    Couple*-“That’s right. You see, we’re all bisexual. I love Jane and Robert, Jane loves me and June, June loves Robert and Jane, and Robert loves June and me. All of us getting married together is the only way that we can express our sexual preferences in a marital relationship.”

    Clerk -“But we’ve only been granting licenses to gay and lesbian couples.”

    Couple*-“So you’re discriminating against bisexuals!”

    Clerk -“No, it’s just that, well, the traditional idea of marriage is that it’s just for couples.”

    Couple*-“Since when are you standing on tradition?”

    Clerk -“Well, I mean, you have to draw the line somewhere.”

    Couple*-“Who says? There’s no logical reason to limit marriage to couples. The more the better. Besides, we demand our rights! The mayor says the constitution guarantees equal protection under the law. Give us a marriage license!”

    Clerk -“All right, all right.”

    Marriage License Clerk Walks Off The Job After Too Many Bizarre Requests - C.S.C. Media Group U.S.
    Thanks from Monk-Eye and aboutenough

  2. #2
    No mercy for losers Addiction Solitaire Champion, Double Deuce Champion, Queen Jewels Champion, Ray Ray Shuffle Champion, Twins Champion, Blow Up: Arcade Champion, Bunch - Time Trial Champion, Znax Champion, Zoo Keeper Champion, Sobics School Champion, Swap a Smiley Champion, Makos Champion, Dino Drop Champion, Flower Frenzy Champion, Some Puzzle Champion, Funny Bubbles Champion, CubeZ Champion, Dinky Smash Champion, Fun Fun Animals Champion, Fruit Fabriek Champion, Raft Wars Champion, Rainbow Monkey RunDown Champion, Raft Wars Champion, Crime Puzzle Champion Blueneck's Avatar
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    This is humor, not a news story. Go back and look closer at the link.
    Thanks from TennesseeRain and Friday13

  3. #3
    Galactic Ruler Spookycolt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blueneck View Post
    This is humor, not a news story. Go back and look closer at the link.
    Did I claim it wasn't?

    You are missing the point of the thread however.

    How do you justify discrimination against those other groups while allowing homosexuals to marry?

    Try thinking outside of the box for once.
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    Veteran Member Eve1's Avatar
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    Moron

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    sosdd.

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    What? A satirical article? Why I knew that when I posted it. Really. I did.

    Really.

    Who is being discriminated against in regards to marriage and why have they not filed a suit?

    What you have are hypotheticals, not fucking reality.
    Thanks from Babylon

  7. #7
    Galactic Ruler Spookycolt's Avatar
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    Lots of you guys dodging so far and no solid answers.

    Guess I stumped you.

    Do you agree with discriminating against these other groups or not?

    Simple question.

  8. #8
    No mercy for losers Addiction Solitaire Champion, Double Deuce Champion, Queen Jewels Champion, Ray Ray Shuffle Champion, Twins Champion, Blow Up: Arcade Champion, Bunch - Time Trial Champion, Znax Champion, Zoo Keeper Champion, Sobics School Champion, Swap a Smiley Champion, Makos Champion, Dino Drop Champion, Flower Frenzy Champion, Some Puzzle Champion, Funny Bubbles Champion, CubeZ Champion, Dinky Smash Champion, Fun Fun Animals Champion, Fruit Fabriek Champion, Raft Wars Champion, Rainbow Monkey RunDown Champion, Raft Wars Champion, Crime Puzzle Champion Blueneck's Avatar
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    From
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spookycolt View Post
    Did I claim it wasn't?

    You are missing the point of the thread however.

    How do you justify discrimination against those other groups while allowing homosexuals to marry?

    Try thinking outside of the box for once.
    You should have posted it in the humor section. Or conspiracy theories. There's no reason for anyone to "discuss" problems that haven't and probably never will arise from allowing gays to marry.

    You might as well start a thread about safety precautions to take in the event of a sharknado.

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by Spookycolt View Post
    Lots of you guys dodging so far and no solid answers.

    Guess I stumped you.

    Do you agree with discriminating against these other groups or not?

    Simple question.
    Simple answer.

    It's not real. You are positing hypotheticals Spookycolt PhD.

  10. #10
    Galactic Ruler Spookycolt's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Think for myself View Post
    What? A satirical article? Why I knew that when I posted it. Really. I did.

    Really.

    Who is being discriminated against in regards to marriage and why have they not filed a suit?

    What you have are hypotheticals, not fucking reality.
    Hypothetical huh?

    Mother and daughter arrested over incestuous marriage in America



    A
    A 43-year-old woman and her 23-year-old daughter have been arrested and charged with incest after authorities in Oklahoma discovered they were married.

    Patricia Spann, the mother, had lost custody of her three children some years ago. The daughter, Misty, and her two brother were raised by a grandparent.

    Ms Spann was reunited with daughter Misty two years ago, and records show that the two women got married in March this year.
    Mother and daughter arrested over incestuous marriage in America

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