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Thread: Column: Melania Trump isn't missing ó she's living with the Obamas!

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    Column: Melania Trump isn't missing ó she's living with the Obamas!

    Rex HuppkeContact Reporter
    Chicago Tribune
    Letís talk about Melania Trump.

    Americaís first lady was last seen in public on May 10. On Friday morning we learned she wonít join the president this weekend at Camp David. Her absence has sparked all manner of wild theorizing, from rumors of plastic surgery to suggestions she moved back to New York City.

    snip

    But Iím here to tell you itís far more scandalous than anyone imagined.

    After minutes of careful conjuring and professional assumptionizing, I unraveled the truth: The Deep State helped sneak Melania out of the White House through a tunnel and she is now living with Barack and Michelle Obama.

    snip

    This is the timeline of events:

    April 21: Melania attends the funeral of former first lady Barbara Bush and is photographed sitting next to Barack and Michelle Obama. Suspiciously, Melania is smiling warmly for the first time in recorded history.

    May 7: Melania introduces her anti-bullying campaign: Be Best. Itís a clear shot at her husband, who invented bullying and prides himself on being worst.

    May 10: The first lady is last seen in public.

    May 14: Melania has kidney surgery at Walter Reed Medical Center. It wasnít announced publicly until the surgery was over. Few details are given.

    May 19: The White House reports that the first lady has returned to the White House, though thereís no explanation for a five-day hospital stay following a surgery many doctors said is often an outpatient procedure.

    more:

    Melania Trump isn't missing ? she's living with the Obamas! - Chicago Tribune
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    Were it not for the sinkhole, they'd have never figured it out.
    Thanks from BigLeRoy, BDBoop, Friday13 and 1 others

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    Quote Originally Posted by labrea View Post
    Rex HuppkeContact Reporter
    Chicago Tribune
    Letís talk about Melania Trump.

    Americaís first lady was last seen in public on May 10. On Friday morning we learned she wonít join the president this weekend at Camp David. Her absence has sparked all manner of wild theorizing, from rumors of plastic surgery to suggestions she moved back to New York City.

    snip

    But Iím here to tell you itís far more scandalous than anyone imagined.

    After minutes of careful conjuring and professional assumptionizing, I unraveled the truth: The Deep State helped sneak Melania out of the White House through a tunnel and she is now living with Barack and Michelle Obama.

    snip

    This is the timeline of events:

    April 21: Melania attends the funeral of former first lady Barbara Bush and is photographed sitting next to Barack and Michelle Obama. Suspiciously, Melania is smiling warmly for the first time in recorded history.

    May 7: Melania introduces her anti-bullying campaign: Be Best. Itís a clear shot at her husband, who invented bullying and prides himself on being worst.

    May 10: The first lady is last seen in public.

    May 14: Melania has kidney surgery at Walter Reed Medical Center. It wasnít announced publicly until the surgery was over. Few details are given.

    May 19: The White House reports that the first lady has returned to the White House, though thereís no explanation for a five-day hospital stay following a surgery many doctors said is often an outpatient procedure.

    more:

    Melania Trump isn't missing ? she's living with the Obamas! - Chicago Tribune
    Gee, I only wish it were true. Her smile at a FUNERAL was the biggest and most genuine I've seen on her face.
    Thanks from labrea, Friday13 and Dragonfly5

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    Quote Originally Posted by cpicturetaker12 View Post
    Gee, I only wish it were true. That smile at a FUNERAL was the biggest and most genuine I've seen on her face.

    Seriously though, she's disappeared for over three weeks now, hasn't she?

    Hope she's okay, wherever she is.
    Thanks from labrea and BigLeRoy

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    Quote Originally Posted by NightSwimmer View Post
    Were it not for the sinkhole, they'd have never figured it out.
    Lolol!
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    Just in case everyone doesn't know this. The orange one was asked a few days ago how she was by the press gaggle outside thw WH. He pointed up at a WH window, she's fine, she's right up there, which prompted everyone to look. No one was there.
    Thanks from NightSwimmer, BigLeRoy and Friday13

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    Maybe it was just too Stormy for her taste in DC. Perhaps she moved back to NYC?

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    Quote Originally Posted by NightSwimmer View Post
    Maybe it was just too Stormy for her taste in DC. Perhaps she moved back to NYC?
    Smartass��

    I did hear recently her parents bought a place in N. Va. Wonder if she is hiding out there?
    Thanks from Friday13

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    Quote Originally Posted by cpicturetaker12 View Post
    Smartass��

    I did hear recently her parents bought a place in N. Va. Wonder if she is hiding out there?

    The weather's better there than in Florida this time of year.

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    "Suspiciously, Melania is smiling warmly for the first time in recorded history."

    /dies
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