APA: 'Traditional Masculinity' Is Harmful to Boys, Men

Macduff

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Apr 2010
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Are you going to do anything more than troll?
I've been discussing the topic. You've been providing an example of what happens when boys are taught that it's ok to cry in public.
Now give me something to respond to besides sniffling what a bad person I am and I'll be happy to discuss the topic with you too
 
Jul 2016
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I've been discussing the topic. You've been providing an example of what happens when boys are taught that it's ok to cry in public.
Now give me something to respond to besides sniffling what a bad person I am and I'll be happy to discuss the topic with you too
I already made my comment.

APA: 'Traditional Masculinity' Is Harmful to Boys, Men

If you'd like me to add to it, I can only say that if you're this concerned about your masculinity or lack thereof, you won't find the help you need here.

Try a good therapist. One that specializes in immature smartasses.
 

Rasselas

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What exactly am I misinterpreting here? The APA explicitly said that traditional masculinity is harmful. APA issues first-ever guidelines for practice with men and boys
And it's bullshit. Being a man who seeks achievement or adventure or is stoic is not a pathology that needs cured.
If that's their nature, sure. But if they are fulfilling a gender role and suppressing emotions, that can be unhealthy. And there's a difference between seeking adventure and seeking danger. Sensible men don't become great soldiers because they like fighting battles. That's nuts. The last thing you want is a general who LIKES war. it's a myth that military officers prefer a state of war. If you like to commit violence--even if you get to do so in a context where it's socially acceptable--that's a pathology.
The next time someone breaks into the home of one of these hack researchers, let them call Sam Fender instead of a traditionally masculine cop.
The thing is, the guy breaking into the home IS TRADITIONALLY MASCULINE. Also, cops are watched rather carefully for psychological problems (or at least they should be) and are encouraged NOT to be detached from their feelings. That's different from being "stoical," by the way, which is a philosophy. It doesn't represent an absence of emotion but a sense of comparing all emotional reactions to reality. It's quite healthy. It's the APPEARANCE of stoicism without actually having the internal conversation that stoicism requires that can be problematic.
 

Rasselas

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Both. But artists and everyone else shouldn't try to demonize the qualities that are necessary to become first responders.
You think it's necessary to suppress emotions, fail to ask for help or admit fault, and project invulnerability--not just in certain moments but as a way of being all the time--in order to be a first responder? I think you're full of it.
 
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Rasselas

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It's qualities specifically listed as negatives by the report like aggression, seeking adventure or risk, or stoicism (you can't be a good first responder or soldier if you can't control your emotions in a crisis).
In a crisis, yes. But what about the rest of the time? The people I've met who are successful police officers, or military brass, or even fire fighters have been relatively gentle, emotionally-balanced sorts of men when it's NOT a crisis. To command requires introspection sometimes. That's what traditional masculinity, as it is detailed in this report, tends to inhibit.
 
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Davocrat

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In a crisis, yes. But what about the rest of the time? The people I've met who are successful police officers, or military brass, or even fire fighters have been relatively gentle, emotionally-balanced sorts of men when it's NOT a crisis. To command requires introspection sometimes. That's what traditional masculinity, as it is detailed in this report, tends to inhibit.
There's a lot of study about what behaviors and individual defaults to under stress, when relaxed and during conflict. The important thing to be successful is to work on having the correct response to each. E.g., If you're in "emergency mode" barking orders when things are just business as usual, you're probably causing some stress among others. There are all kinds of assessments that reveal how people rate on these scales.

There are also at least four styles of leadership. One, the most basic, is command-and-control in which the leader knows everything (or acts like she does) and the followers "don't need to know." That sounds kind of autocratic, but there ARE times when this is the best mode of leadership...like in combat.

But when you're trying to get a group to strategically plan and manage its direction, the leader should shift to a higher type of leadership where everyone acknowledges that nobody knows the answers and everyone has to work on developing them in concert.

Leadership is hard.
 
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I see where being a hyper macho “manly man” could be an issue. But I don’t really define masculinity that way. So the classic “man card” thing doesn’t really apply. To me? It is about handling your business. That includes your emotions.

There is nothing wrong with a sense of self and purpose that also includes your identity as a man.